Journal Format

New Times Roman, Arial or Calibri font style
Use 12 point font, 1 inch margin, double spaced
No limit of length as long as you are providing a meaningful response with a minimum of 2 paragraphs in length. Quality work over quantity or length.
Use proper sentences

Active Listening

In this activity, you will practice the skill of active listening by writing out a conversation with our Inner Guide. As discussed in the PowerPoint, thoughts are dashing through your minds much of the time. Writing a conversation with your Inner Guide applies this knowledge in a new and powerful way. First, it helps us become more aware of the thoughts that are guiding our choices. Second, writing this conversation encourages us to sort through confusion and find a positive solution. Third, it reminds us that we are not our thoughts and we can change them whenever doing so would benefit us. And, finally, writing this conversation with our Inner guide gives us practice with an important mental skill used by highly intelligent and adaptive people: metacognition.

Metacognition is the skill of thinking about our thinking. Developing metacognition helps us see where our thinking is flawed. It allows us to change our thinking to achieve better outcomes and experiences. If you have ever talked to yourself while working on a problem, you were probably using metacognition. You may find writing this dialogue to be a new or unusual experience. However, the more you practice, the more you will see what a valuable success skill it is to have a conversation with yourself as an active listener. And of course, becoming an active listener with others will strengthen those relationships immeasurably.

What to Do

1- Write a conversation between you and your Inner Guide (IG) about a problem you are facing in life. Label each of your IG’s responses with a listening skill it uses: silence, expansion, clarification, reflection (remember to reflect feelings as well as thoughts). Let your IG demonstrate the skills of active listening without giving advice.

2- Write what you have learned about active listening during this conversation with your IG and what changes will you make in your communications. Remember to dive deep to discover a powerful insight. When you think you have written all you can, see if you can write at leas one more paragraph.

Example

• Me: I’ve been realizing what a difficult time I have asking for assistance.
• IG: Would you like to say more about it? (Expansion)
• Me: Well, I’ve been having trouble in math. I know I should be asking questions in class, but …I don’t know. I guess I feel dumb that I can’t do the problems myself.
• IG: You seem frustrated that you can’t solve the math problems without help. (Reflection)
• Me: That’s right. I’ve always resisted that sort of thing.
• IG: What do you mean by “that sort of thing?” (Clarification)
• Me: I mean that ever since I can remember, I’ve had to do everything on my own. When I was a kid, I used to play alone all the time.
• IG: Uh-huh (Silence)
• Me: As a kid, I never had anyone to help me. and I don’t have any one to help me now.
• IG: So, no one is available to help you? Is that how it seems? (Reflection)
• Me: Well, I guess I could ask Robert for help. He seems really good in math, but i’m kind of scared to ask him.
• IG: What scares you about asking him? (Expansion)
• etc…
• 2-3 paragraphs
• contains all 4 steps of active listening discussed in the chapter.
  1- listen to understand
  2- clear your mind and remain silent
  3- ask the person to expand
  4- reflect the other person’s thoughts and feelings
• 1 paragraph explaining the learning outcome
• inner conversation
  in your conversations, identify and mention your inner guide, inner defend, and inner critic,
• Unconscious Forces
  Based on Leverrier’s theory of Invisible Forces, identify your unconscious forces (saved in amygdala) that sometimes result in self-sabotage